Prolegomena

I sub-titled this collection of posts that represent my collection of guest posts at Womanist Musings, run and edited by Renee Martin, “nascent thoughts on gender and colonialism” because in many ways these posts hold the seeds to many parts of my current thoughts on gender and colonialism.

except

i started doing the guest posts at Womanist Musings about six of so months after i decided to start my own blog. the time period for the posts stretch almost a year (but there are only 36 posts because i missed quite a few weeks). one thing to mention, though, is that only 30 of the 36 posts were ever actually posted at Womanist Musings, the last 6 posts of this collection have never been posted or published anywhere else.

a lot of my ideas and thoughts were only half-formed at this point. I hadn’t quite settled down on my voice. i was also very unsure of my place in my respective communities. doing the posts at Womanist Musings did a lot to help me find my voice and place (which… ultimately ended up not being at Womanist Musings, since I ended up plopping myself on tumblr which became a year long time suck. lol.)

These days. I feel more secure in who I am and what I have to say. And how I say it.

As I went through these posts to get them prepped for publishing, there were many places where, if I had been writing this today, I would have phrased things differently or not said them at all. These really do represent my nascent thoughts. And, as such, are a messy squalling thing.

I can also now spot the places where i’ve improved on. Where, months after my last post at Womanist Musings and looking over all the posts from beginning to end, I can see how much decolonizing I’ve done. I can also see how much of the core of my ideas and beliefs have remained the same.

It was pretty tempting, I do have to say, to edit out the stuff that I can tell demonstrates my internalized racism, transmisogyny, ableism. The stuff I can tell is simply oppressive.

But. These words are already out there. And I believe in transparency and accountability. This represents, in a few ways, the beginning.

So I look forward to some of the criticisms likely to arise. This is part of what started the conversation in my life. It is a conversation I’m happy to have with other people. I still have so much to learn. And to say.

Only the beginning.